Friday, November 12, 2010


I get a lot of messages and emails from people telling me that I'm "amazing" or "fabulous"...and I have to say, I don't understand that. I'm just a person with a sick mother who is doing what needs to be done. I love my Mom...and I know that in a heartbeat, she would do the same for me.

So many of you ask how do I do it...well, as a friend wrote to me tonight, "How can we not?" I think that struck a chord with me...every day, I'm just doing what needs to be done to get through the day. How can I not do it? How can I not care for my children or my mom? It isn't fabulous, it isn't amazing, it isn't even is just life, and it needs to be done. I can't say I ever feel like I'm doing it well...but I'm doing my best to make it all happen.

I'm lucky - I've had an army of people helping me...I have the luxury of babysitters, a husband and a father that are very present, wonderful caretakers for Mom, and so many friends and family bringing food and helping whenever they can. Gives a whole new meaning to the phrase "it takes a village."

My day started early this morning - my mom was up before 7, a bit confused about the time. I have to say, for just a second I wished I had another hour and a half to relax...and then I pulled myself up and got going. Micah and Maya were awake early, too. My mom got up and out of bed and we ate an early breakfast together. I packed up a bag for the day, and started to get the kids ready. Betty arrived at 8:30, and she spent the next hour getting my mother dressed and ready for the day.

Megan took Micah to preschool today. I love that she sends me texts with pictures of Micah at his cutest throughout the day, like these:

I hate that I have had to rely on her so often, but we had to take Mom to the doctor's office this morning. Mom, Dad, Maya, Betty and I left for our appointments at 10:30. We first met with Mom's endocrinologist. Mom is doing well, and the doctor made some changes to Mom's medicine protocol. I expect her sugar levels will dramatically improve over the next few days.

Our next appointment was with the hematologist. My Mom's platelets had dropped again, and she will need increased monitoring. Her white blood count is incredibly low, too, so that is of great concern. He informed us that Mom will likely not be permitted to continue with her monthly chemotherapy...that was the biggest shock. We are worried about what this means for Mom long term. For now, they are holding off on a platelet transfusion until they see what happens over the next few days. She is having more blood drawn tomorrow, and we'll see where we are. In the meantime, her appointment went well.

We arrived home from our appointments and Mom had her second lunch and took a nap. Micah was napping all afternoon. We had to deal with our landlady about repairing the house (there is a leak in the basement now). Mom's speech therapy was after her nap, and the kids woke up and were playing all afternoon. Maya was difficult again at bedtime - I wish she would just go to bed! We have a full day ahead tomorrow.

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