Tuesday, January 13, 2009

My breast pump talks

Once I tell you this, I am certain you will think I am crazy (well, even crazier). This morning, when I woke up at 5:30 am to try and pump, I became convinced that my breast pump talks. The motor makes this grinding noise that actually sounds like a word. Well, really a phrase. I kept hearing over and over again while I pumped:


I woke DH up to make him listen. He thought I was nuts and it wasn't saying "Get away." I then thought maybe it was saying "Natalie." At my next pumping session, the "Get away" mantra melded into "Oedipus" at one point before doing a chorus of "Natalie" and then returning to "Get away." This last pumping session, it pretty consistently chanted "Get away" at me (with a few "Natalie" lines thrown in). I have to say, I think I hate my breast pump as much as it hates me. I'd like nothing better than to throw it through the big picture windows in our dining room . . . but we did just pay to replace them all, so that would be foolish.

So . . . who is planning to be the first to call the crazy authorities on me?


Chele said...

ROFLMAO! Ummmm, I think sleep deprevation has finally caught up with you. Have you put your car keys in the fridge or freezer yet?

Me said...

I don't think so . . . but then again, I haven't seen my keys in over a week - perhaps I should check the refrigerator. . . or the medicine cabinet?

Me said...

One of my online friends recently informed me that her breast pump also talks to her - but it tells her "you're pretty." Clearly, my breast pump hates me, and no wonder it won't pump out much milk! I asked her if she wanted to swap, but no such luck :(.