Let's talk about food....

I thought I'd kick off this post with a discussion about food. I've been finding feeding Micah a challenge lately. He is becoming quite picky, and it is always either feast or famine with him. He is currently eating a diet of 100% table food (no more baby food for us!), but I am often unsure whether he is eating enough or eating healthy.

I think we have the best handle on breakfast. Micah wakes up in the morning and he will drink some milk - anywhere from 1-5 ounces. We usually sit and snuggle a bit on the couch while he is drinking his milk, and then he likes to go play with his toys and chase the dog. While he is playing, I prepare his breakfast (well, sometimes his Daddy does the cooking, too). We seem to have a "rotation" of breakfast foods - we either give Micah waffles, pancakes, french toast, scrambled eggs or cereal. I prefer to give him french toast over regular toast because he gets some protein that way, too (since we use the bread to soak up an entire egg). I usually put a bit of cinnamon and vanilla in with his french toast, we try to vary the waffle and pancake flavors (blueberry, pumpkin, plain, etc.). We always give him fruit with breakfast - sometimes we put applesauce or homemade jam and/or yogurt on top of the waffles/pancakes/french toast. With the eggs, sometimes we mix in veggies or melt cheese on top. He will usually eat a pretty hearty breakfast...except when he doesn't. At the very least, I can usually get him to eat 1/2 a banana.

Sometimes, Micah likes to drink more milk later in the morning. I think on daycare days, they give him a morning snack of breakfast foods (although I am never sure how much he eats there). Around 10:30, we put him down for his nap, and he likes to sleep until at least 12. When he gets up from his nap, he usually drinks a few more ounces of milk and we start preparing lunch. I am beginning to find lunches a bit more difficult and boring. He will usually eat a melted cheese sandwich, but how many days in a row should he really be eating that? Micah also loves pizza - but isn't that just a fancy melted cheese sandwich? We are able to sneak some pureed veggies in with the tomato sauce when we make pizza. He will eat hummus and chips as well for lunch. He does not seem to be particularly fond of eating meat/chicken for lunch - that is pretty much always a bust. We have very little luck getting him to eat pasta, although occasionally he'll eat some tortellini or some lasagna. Micah loves veggie burgers - we usually alternate that with dinner a few times each week. I'm thinking of testing the waters with peanut butter soon to expand our lunch options. We've tried a number of other options - spinach patties (see the recipe below), and I make these delicious veggie/cheese/bisquick squares that he seems to like as well. Once again, we'll top off the lunch meal with either some crackers, bread, and/or fruit - if all else fails, Micah will load up on fruit. Currently, he is having a love affair with Clementines - I think he would eat a dozen a day if I let him. Does anyone else have some good lunch suggestions for a picky 1 year old with only 4 teeth?

Naptime hits anywhere from 2:30-3:30. When he wakes up, I offer him milk and an afternoon snack. Afternoon snacks are the easiest - fruit is always a safe bet, but veggies are almost always a no-go. I buy him these sippy pouches of organic baby food that mixes fruit and veggies together - he loves to feed himself the sippy pouches and it is the best way to sneak in some veggies. Sometimes, Micah eats cheese for a snack, or crackers, or fruit, or cereal, or mum mums, or dried fruits (we are currently loving freeze-dried strawberries - the freeze dried fruits are wonderful because they sort of crumble and melt in Micah's mouth). Pretty much any basic "snack" food is a hit with my little man.

Dinner time falls around 6 or 6:30. Once again, I find dinner challenging, and I am feeling starved for new ideas. Some nights (like tonight) a veggie burger is a hit. He particularly enjoys eating it with a touch of marinara sauce and a fork. I give Micah turkey burgers and hamburgers (with veggies mixed in), and we'll try tortellini, lasagna, and pizza, but other nights there seems to be no winning. Some nights, everything I hand him ends up on the floor. At least the dog is always up for some dinner! On those nights, I try to get Micah to eat some crackers or cheese or fruit and call it a night.

We round out the day with some milk before bed. The last few nights, Micah says "night night" to me when he goes upstairs to sleep. It is just SOOO cute! I love watching how he communicates now - he knows the signs for "Itsy Bitsy Spider," he tells me when he wants more food and when he is all done eating. He is using words more and more often, and just turning into a little boy before my eyes.

As promised, here is the recipe for my spinach patties:

1 pkg. chopped spinach—thawed and drained
½ cup bread crumbs
1 onion sautéed
¼ cup mozzarella cheese
½ cup egg beaters (or 2 eggs)
2 tbsp. parmesan cheese
Seasonings (I usually add garlic and a touch of salt)

Mix all ingredients together and make into patties. Bake at 350^o – 45 minutes to 1 hour. Can be made into a loaf.
Optional: shredded carrots, either cooked or sautéed, can be added.

Micah loved these! I used organic frozen spinach, an organic vidalia onion and organic cheese and eggs.

Snowmageddon 2010

We are buried under over 30 inches of snow - and it is still snowing! The snow began yesterday morning at 9:00 am and 31 hours later it is still going strong. They are predicting that the final large patches of snow will pass through here by 8:00, and the snow should be finished by midnight. If only they weren't predicting more snow on Tuesday...I did not end up taking Micah out today to play in the snow, but here are a few pictures to illustrate the mess!

Twoey's 20 week OB appointment and ultrasound

Yesterday was my 20 week OB appointment. Although they made us wait 1 1/2 hours to see the midwife, it was a rather uneventful appointment. We listened to (and recorded) Twoey's heartbeat (it was in the 160s).



No weight gain yet, and my belly was measuring right on target. Everything is looking good so far. I did have a discussion with this midwife about getting a prescription for Reglan if I have issues with my milk supply after Twoey is born, and she was quite willing to help me out. We were supposed to get a prescription for an AFP tests (checks my blood for a protein that is an indicator of spina bifida) and my first trimester bloodwork (long story, but I still haven't gotten that done). Because we were running so late, we grabbed our prescriptions and ran - only to find out that once AGAIN, the nurse forgot to give me the prescription for the AFP (it is actually supposed to be done between weeks 17 and 18, and no later than 20 weeks). I tried calling the office, but the nurse could not find the midwife's notation about the AFP and was unwilling to fax me the script before talking to her. I was told I needed to get the test done yesterday or not take it at all, but, of course, they did not fax me the prescription. Now it is officially too late for me to have that test done.

Today we had our ultrasound - the full anatomy scan. Twoey was EXTREMELY uncooperative (perhaps I should not have eaten that cookie for breakfast...), so unfortunately the pictures we did get were awful. She spent much of the time turning away from the ultrasound and it took the tech about 30 minutes to get all the pictures of her heart. The doctor had to come back for a second look to see her aorta. They checked her brain, her kidneys, her bladder, her stomach, her heart and all of her limbs. She IS still a girl, and everything looks perfect. She is 12 ounces and measuring at 20 weeks and 2 days. Her spine was perfect, too, and when we asked about the AFP, the maternal fetal medicine specialist felt that the results of the ultrasound were clear, and the only other thing the AFP could indicate is an issue with the placenta. He said that if the test came back elevated, the "prescription" for that would be monthly ultrasounds, which I am getting anyway. In other words, the doctor felt it was no big deal that we could not get the AFP done, so I feel relieved about that. They also measured Frank and Fiona, who seem to be holding steady at 4 and 3 cms, respectively.

Profile - tushy up in the air:


Hands over head:

Hands crossed over face:



Skeleton face:

Finally, they did measure my cervical length. It dropped to 3.5 cms, which is still considered "safe" at this point in the pregnancy, however, it is unusual to lose about 1 cm of cervical length over the course of a month at only 20 weeks. After I had my initial bout of early labor with Micah at 28 weeks, my cervix shrunk from 4.6 down to 3.8 cms at 28 weeks, and they were concerned then. I think the biggest worry at this point is that I'm losing the "cushion" - if I develop contractions again, my cervix is already shrinking and it may be harder to stave off labor and keep me pregnant. I have to go back in 2 weeks for a cervical length check. If it continues to shrink, we may have to get a bit more aggressive with either medications or bedrest. As long as my cervix stays above 2.6 for now, they will keep me up and moving around, so for right now, everything is okay.

And for good measure, here are some belly shots of me at 19 weeks:




Last night, Micah used a fork for the first time!! We were at my parents' house for another night of shiva, eating dinner. Micah was not particularly interested in the cheese or the bagels or the tuna fish, so I made him a veggie burger. He spotted my fork, and he made it quite clear he wanted it. I tried stabbing a piece of veggie burger with the fork and feeding it to him. He quickly stole the fork from me...and went about feeding himself with a fork! I was amazed that he could handle it so well - it never dawned on me to give it a try. He needed a bit of help getting the pieces onto the fork, but he ate the entire veggie burger that way. Once again, tonight at dinner, Micah wanted a fork. He ate two small turkey burgers with his fork - and this time, he was even able to stab the meat himself. Apparently, Micah loves to use a fork (something I find particularly humorous as his uncle STILL rarely uses a fork!

I am definitely due for a picture post - I have a ton of pictures and video of Micah to add to the blog - I'll definitely have to get to that this weekend while we are snowed in!

The Itsy Bitsy Spider

For the past few weeks, Micah has been doing this...thing...with his hands, and I haven't been able to figure out what it means. It sort of looks like a clap or like he is wiping his hands - he takes one hand and smacks it down on top of the other hand, then alternates. I felt certain he was trying to tell me something, but I had no clue WHAT. At meal time, I've been working with him to figure out what it means. In the process, I've learned that Micah knows the sign for "more" and for "all done." He has added a few other spoken words recently - he is regularly saying "bye bye" and "hi" and "mama" and "dad" and "ball" and "bubble" and he definitely has a word for dog and can say "nuh nuh" for the dog's name. He even said "Big Bird" today (and yes, I'm surprised it wasn't "Elmo").

Well, tonight we were having shiva at my parents' house. For those of you who are unfamiliar with Jewish traditions, shiva is a 7 day period of mourning following the death of a family member. During shiva, all the mirrors are supposed to be covered, and the mourning family members wear a torn piece of black cloth to represent their loss. Friends supply food so the family does not have to worry about food, and people come over to comfort the family and say prayers. There is one prayer, the Mourner's Kadish, that can only be said if at least 10 people are present. The point is that those in mourning should never have to mourn alone.

My family's version of shiva is a bit more relaxed. Micah was there, and having a lot of fun showing off for everyone. He was quite chatty during the brief services, and once again, he brought some joy to a sad occasion. As my Dad was sitting with Micah, he started singing to him - the "Itsy Bitsy Spider." All of the sudden, Micah started to do the hand motions, starting with the hand slapping he has been doing for a few weeks. He put his arms up in the air for up came the sun, and he had motions for drying up the rain. My heart MELTED!! I can't believe my little boy does the "Itsy Bitsy Spider!!"

I think I'd like to close this blog with my favorite memorial prayer - I think it truly speaks to how I feel about those we lose:

At the rising of the sun and at its going down We remember them.
At the blowing of the wind and the chill of winter We remember them.
At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring We remember them.
At the blueness of the skies and in the warmth of summer We remember them.
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn We remember them.
At the beginning of the year and when it ends We remember them.
As long as we live, they too will live; for they are now a part of us, as we remember them.
When we are weary and in need of strength We remember them.
When we are lost and sick at heart We remember them.
When we have joy we crave to share We remember them.
When we have decisions that are difficult to make We remember them.
When we have achievements that are based on theirs We remember them.
As long as we live, they too will live; for they are now a part of us, as we remember them.

The final goodbye

Today we buried my grandmother. It is a day I have been dreading, and yet...a relief in so many ways. My grandmother's condition has just been hanging over our heads for so long now. Even before her fall a few weeks ago, every time I left town, I wondered "how will I get back if she dies?" I worried about planning trips far away, and I know my mother was always concerned about going on vacation. The past few weeks have intensified that, as we knew the end was coming.

I've shared before about my grandmother over the last few years, but she was so much more than her dementia. My grandmother was truly a wonderful woman, and I loved her dearly. We were incredibly close all those years, I think almost from the moment I was born. I remember going to spend a few weeks by myself with my grandmother every summer, I think even before I was a year old. During my visits, we would go to movies, and we would play, and my grandmother would take me out to lunch and dinner, and we would visit her friends, and we would go with my grandfather to the park at the corner, and we would spend our days at "The Club," swimming at the pool and meeting my grandfather after his rounds of golf. Without fail, we ALWAYS made a shopping trip or two on my visits, and we had time to spend with family (visiting cousins and great aunts). I loved my summer visits with my grandparents.

Throughout the year, my entire family would drive up to visit my grandparents a few times each year, and they would come down to visit us as well. For most of my life, my grandparents spent their winters in Florida, and most years, we drove down to Florida to visit them. I have so many memories of all of those visits - going to Disney World, spending time at the park, shopping, seeing the miniature trains, eating Gram's brownies, and even giving her a hard time about eating my sandwiches (I liked them cut in triangles, and she would cut them in rectangles). I even remember her telling me to eat my crusts so I could grow curly hair.

After my grandfather died 21 1/2 years ago, my grandmother stayed strong. She decided to travel to Asia, and she continued to travel and drive down to visit us. My grandmother flew down a few times to visit me when I lived in Atlanta for college, and we spoke a few times a week on the telephone. I remember sharing all of my stories with her, and she also regaled me with stories of her college days. I mentioned going to fraternity parties, and she told me about how the women at her college would go move into the fraternity houses for a weekend (and the boys would move out) and they would clean and cook and have a wonderful party. I remember laughing and thinking that times had changed, and I knew very few women who would voluntarily move into a fraternity house for the weekend and clean! My freshman year of college, we had a boy on our floor announce our voice mail message - it said "Hi, this is Matt, S & T's personal masseur. They can't come to the phone right now as they are...occupied, so leave a message and they'll call you back." My grandmother laughed at the message, and told me she hoped he was really cute.

After college, I moved to New York to attend law school. My grandmother used to take a day bus up to visit me. Sometimes, we would just have lunch and wander around, and other times we would go see a Broadway show together. One time, she came up to see the Christmas windows. We ended up walking from Rockefeller Center all the way down to Soho. Did I mention my grandmother was about 85 at the time? And in a skirt and heels? For her 86th birthday, I took her to see Chicago. In between these visits, I would often catch a bus out to visit her for a weekend here and there. One of my last bus trips from New York before I graduated happened in April of my third year of law school. I had been looking into getting a dog, and I learned that there was a brand new litter of cocker spaniel poodle mixes that had just been born at a farm about 30 minutes from where my grandmother lived. I called my grandmother and asked her if she was up for company that weekend. She said of course, and then I told her there was a catch - she had to come with me to look at puppies. She made this big, dramatic, exaggerated sigh, and said "Well, if you twist my arm, I guess I'll just have to suffer through that trip with you." We laughed, and that weekend, we picked out my dog together. A few weeks later (after law school graduation), I drove back up to pick up my dog. It was my grandmother who suggested the name for my dog - after her favorite chocolate candies.

My grandmother never wore pants a day in her life until she was well into her 80s. For many years, she walked a few miles every morning wearing a skirt and heels (1/4 inch heels - her "walking" shoes). It took us years to convince her that pants were appropriate for around the house, morning walks, and even driving down to visit us, and about as long to get her to buy a pair of "walking" shoes. It was only once her dementia set in that she wore pants on a regular basis. When I picture my grandmother, I envision her in one of two outfits - a royal blue suit (I think she wore it to my high school graduation, or maybe my college graduation) - royal blue was one of her favorite colors to wear - or a white skirt with a seafoam green short-sleeved sweater that she hand-knit.

My grandmother also had a ton of sayings. Here are just a few:

• So...sew buttons on ice cream and see if they stick.
• Delicious, and nutritious, and pleasing to the palette.
• Look at all the beautiful flora and fauna.
• My grandmother often made loud comments about others she saw - she had definite opinions about men with pony tails and tattoos. Without fail, she always made sure to *loudly* point any such men out to us.
  
• Good thing I don't live in this neighborhood - if I came home drunk, I'd never find my house. (She mostly said this about one street in between our house and the apartment where she moved after she left Pennsylvania to come live near us)
• Once the dementia started to set in, every time we drove her home, we would pass a church, and as we crossed through the light and passed the church sign, she would say "Every time I see that sign I know I'm almost home."
  

There are so many other sayings, and even songs she would sing, but these are the ones that popped into my head as I was writing this blog. Most of all, I just loved talking with my grandmother. She was incredibly intelligent and had a sarcastic and sharp wit about her. We could chat about anything, and mostly laughed. I especially loved her feisty streak, and she had this air of confidence about her. Once she turned 80, she sort of adopted a "who gives a shit what others think of me - I'm over 80" attitude. With that attitude, she bought a silver jacket and a red car, and she stopped worrying what other people thought of her comments. She had a way of making me laugh that I truly miss.

I am so relieved that I was able to be there for her funeral - for my grandmother, for my mother, with my family, but most of all, for me. I needed that final opportunity to say goodbye, but at the same time, I was dreading that final moment. The funeral was scheduled for 3:00 pm today, and we decided to wake up early to make the long drive. I drove to my parents' house, and we met my brother about 1 hour north of here. DH stayed home with Micah, and my SIL stayed home with my brothers' girls. We just knew there was no way to make a 10 hour drive (round-trip) with small children.

Surprisingly, the trip was relatively painless. It was the first time my brother, mother, father and I had all been in a car together (just the 4 of us) for a "family" trip. My family is notorious for fighting in the car. I still sport a chunk of lead in my knee after my brother stabbed me with a pencil on one of those "family" trips. My mom drove the entire way (both ways) and I sat in the front seat. With my morning sickness, I get quite ill if I sit in the back seat, and no one wanted another trip with me throwing up the entire way. My dad mostly slept in the back seat, and my brother worked on his computer for most of the trip. I have to say, I love technology - we had laptops, ipods and cell phones, and we were able to connect to the internet with my DH's myfi card (a wireless internet hub). Amazing how portable technology is!

We arrived in my grandmother's hometown a bit early, so we decided to go eat at her favorite restaurant before heading up to the cemetery. The food was delicious! We had tons of wood oven baked garlic bread, and my mother and I shared eggplant parmesan. We were so stuffed! After that, we drove around town a bit, visiting my grandmother's old house and allowing my mother a trip down memory lane. We then drove out to the cemetery and arrived there a bit early. We took the opportunity to go visit all the graves of our family members. It is Jewish tradition to leave a stone on the graves of a loved one you are visiting. We brought stones from home and left them for our family members. It is sad that the only people we really know anymore in my mother's hometown are all in the cemetery.

The Rabbi showed up first, and he was extremely kind. It was a small gathering - about 10-15 people, including a few cousins, a couple of my grandmother's neighbors, and someone my mother knew in high school. There were just a few quick prayers as we stood graveside in the freezing cold. My mother gave the eulogy:

When I was thinking about what to say today, the usual important words jumped out in describing my mother– loving, caring, fun, a wonderful wife and mother, etc. These words do describe Mom, but perhaps equally as important are these descriptive words—survivor, fighter, feisty, sharp, smart, classy—a lady.

Mom had a privileged life growing up. She was a college graduate before it was fashionable to be one. She worked as a case worker in Public Welfare for 25 years. There were many difficult times in her young life, but she overcame them, held her head high and moved forward. She survived over 21 years after my father’s death. That has been her modus operandi during her entire life. Mom accepted what life handed her and dealt with it -- and her dementia was no different. The dementia began when she was about 85 – until then she would drive down often by herself during the year to visit. When driving became too difficult, when she would get lost, we knew it was time for Mom to be closer to us. She would complain that her memory was awful and couldn’t something be done about it and when I explained that we were doing everything that could be done, she would shrug and say “Ok, then it will be like this” and she would go on. Mom was never angry about her plight and we all worked together to keep Mom independent for as long as we could. Mom moved to an independent living apt. near us and she remained there for several years. When it was no longer possible for her to remain independent we moved Mom to an assisted living group home – there were no arguments, no bitterness—she just said that she trusted us to do the best for her. I hope we did that.

Mom had a bunch of little sayings and when she said them we all would roll our eyes, laugh and say them with her – for instance, in getting in the car she would say “Home, James and don’t spare the horses”, she would talk about the “flora and the fauna” and our favorite was “this was delicious and nutritious and pleasing to the palette”. When I fed her chocolate pudding for the first time in the nursing home, after a few days of clear liquids, she said quietly and slowly “delicious” and then a long pause and then “nutritious” and I finished up with “pleasing to the palette” and a few seconds later she said softly “right, right”. I smiled through my tears – every now and then the old Mom would poke through.

Mom’s last 2 weeks were a true testament to her strength, both physical and mental. She suffered a catastrophic fall and because of her injuries, the doctors said she would only live for a few days—but not surprisingly Mom fooled them and showed her stubbornness - she lived for 16 days, amazing the hospice nurses, the nursing home caregivers, everyone, with her stamina.

Mom has raised the bar high and I only hope that I can reach it as she did. I will miss her and think about her every day of my life. I love you, Mom.

We left shortly after the ceremony concluded, and decided to drive straight home. My mom was buzzing with energy and decided to drive the entire way back home. We had a few hours of good laughing. In our family, it is amazing how we can take something incredibly...mundane...and turn it into a joke. My mother said a number of times that she couldn't believe that the woman she knew from high school was there. My brother, father and I had no idea who this woman was, and next thing you know, my brother is making a HUGE deal out of this. He posted it on facebook, he called about 10 people just to tell them, he jokingly drafted an "inter-office e-mail" announcing her presence at the funeral, and dashing off emails to the Associated Press, Reuters and Matt Lauer. We were laughing hysterically, and couldn't stop joking about the "groundbreaking" news. That is what family is for - they help you find humor again when things are sad. I think my grandmother would have had a great laugh along with us.